"The End" I wrote.

Except, well, I didn't actually write the end.  That part was already written.  (See my previous post on writing the end before getting there.)  I was missing a chunk in the middle, or late middle perhaps.  I had been whittling it down for some time.  Never a large piece in one sit down, and much time between sit downs, so I got kind of discouraged.  I also, like most folks, had a lot of responsibilities to take care of (many of which were new and not entirely expected, so it was difficult to adjust).

Anyway, that's enough sob to the story. ;)  Now that I have, as a friend said earlier today "a beginning, middle, and end" (and I added, "And they're connected!"), it's as if a weight has lifted off of my shoulders and I'm more ready for the next adventure now that the very first step of this one is completed.  In many ways, though I'm happy and excited, I'm not quite as much as I thought I would be.  Instead, I'm content and satisfied.  Not quite as ecstatic, but a comfortable and pleasant place to be all the same.  Although, it is very nice to be told "good job" by friends and family and to get excited with them, especially those who have been with me through this process. 

And it's been a long process.  It took me about a year from start to finish (of the actual writing part, not the pre-planning and all the jazz that I figured out before I even started the first sentence) to get "Makani's Serenity," the rough draft all the way through.  Now I know, writing the end before I get there is not the best way for me to tell a story if I hope to finish it.  So, I should just write faster. ;)

But, even though I spread writing the story out over a year, all in all, it really was just what I needed when I needed.  Writing my book and where I was at every stage helped me write the right emotions, moods, and pace, since I was quite frequently alongside my characters with their struggles, hopes, and efforts.  But that it perhaps, beside the point...for now.

For now, I am glad that I have finished something.  And not just any thing, but a full length novel manuscript.  I am a writer.  Maybe I can do this after all.

My thanks go to many people in many places, but Rebekah Roberts, Hadassah Fey, Jaimie Krycho, Ami Hendrickson, and the Write2TheEnd crew get special shout outs right now for encouraging me, challenging me, and persisting with me (and Jaimie keeps asking if Makani is all right, bless her.  I'm not gonna spoil the ending!).

...Now on to the next story and the next adventure, and mixed in, the wonderful world of editing!

Sometimes, a kick in the rear is what you need. Sometimes.

Okay, I haven't been very accountable about my goal to finish my book by (gulp) Saturday.  Yes, August 14 is already nigh upon me.

I got a little motivation from this guy who's writing a blog post on whatever that's awesome every single day.  I thought it was good to have deadlines and stuff like that.  Something to make you (okay, okay, me) accomplish the task and work toward the goal.  Especially since it is (yikes) visible to the world at large whether or not success is (I've run out of good words - I've used task and goal...next goal, improve vocabulary - without being obnoxious, of course), anyway, finish the race as it were.

But here was my real kick (that's for you Inception fans).  I joined a group on Twitter, #Write2TheEnd, of several writers who have set goals to finish their novels.  It's a support group.  And a challenge group.  I got a "teeny butt kick" from Ami Hendrickson.  It was true, I suppose, that I needed someone to say, Hey, I've noticed that you haven't done what you set out to do.  Of course, I knew I hadn't (not yet), but having some one else involved, someone who cares enough to say, Get back on track, and, You can do it, is a nice thing.  Even if it sometimes involves a teeny butt kick.

So, I finished typing up the 12 handwritten pages I had, and I checked the word count.  In the past nearly-a-month, I wrote 1,638 words in my notebook (well, okay maybe not quite that exact, because the typing was, after all, a chance for a little second drafting).  Anyway, typed up it was 1,638 words.  I'm actually pleased with this number, though it's not anywhere near enough, and (again, a gulp) I'm not changing my deadline marker.

Sooo, Saturday, or by the end of it, I have to cram in some probably, mmm, let's say 7,000 words (in the hopes that that's all it will take to bridge the gap that's left in the story).

7,000 I can do.  I hope.

I'd rather not need another kick in the rear.

So, win, lose, or draw (how one would draw a challenge such as this, I don't know), by Monday I will have an update on this blog to let the world know if I reached my goal or not.

Let's kick this pig!

Makani's Challenge

~

She stares at me with a hard look.  Her slanting pale blue eyes, accentuated by a dark blue ring around each iris, dig into my heart.

I look back at her, knowing I have let her down.

Makani gives me her penetrating, frustrated look.  "Finish the story," she tells me without speaking.

I fidget.  I have finished her story, but I haven't made it complete yet.  That's the problem with writing the end before you get there.

~

It started last year when I took a class for writing novels.  The goal in the class was to write 50,000 words, that make sense, in one novel story.  Since a novel is generally longer than 50,000 words, I purposefully wrote long, going into as much detail as I thought fleshed a scene and character out without aiming to finish the story at the word count.

Of course, I was ambitious and thought I would hit the word count and keep going, still finishing my novel within the duration of the class.

Someday I might learn.

At the beginning of the class, my teacher had told my classmates and myself that he wanted us to write the ends of our stories even if that meant we had to jump ahead to get there.  (He didn't want us to leave the class without knowing how to write the end of a novel.)

The class went on smoothly enough, and I enjoyed getting to know Makani and the other characters better.  After a while, the time came to write the end, and, as you might guess, ambitious though I was, I hadn't even come close to reaching the end.  I had to leap I didn't know how far forward to write the end.  But I knew some of what I wanted for Makani's story, so I went for it.  Long, stressful, uncertain journey crammed within a few weeks later, I was satisfied with the end of Makani's story, and I had met the required word count and passed the class.

Then all I had to do was fill in the gap before I took the next class with the same teacher to edit my story about six weeks later.  No big deal.  Right?

I confess, I still have not filled in what turned out to be a gaping hole in the story.

Thus, Makani's stare.

She and I both know the end.  We both know the things she will learn, the fears she must face, and whether or not she achieves her desires.

But the middle that's missing is important to the impact of the end.  I can't just stitch together the front half to the end without the missing part.  It wouldn't make as much sense, and it certainly wouldn't be satisfying.

~

I sigh.  "I haven't got it in me."  It's not true, but it's been my excuse for months.  "I don't know how."

"I'm stuck back in the middle and can't move forward.  What do you expect me to do?"

My lips twitch up.  She is a stubborn one.  That's part of why I like her so much.

"Finish the story."

I stare at my lap, contemplating how to do so, what I need to do.  I could argue that I don't have the time.  I could even try to argue that I don't have to finish the story.  I know the whole thing; I don't have to go through it again by writing it down.

But that's not true.  And we both know it.

"I need you to do this for me."

I raise my head.  Now she's the one looking down, flicking her fingers.  It's not easy for her to ask for help.  I know that.  But she's been quietly prodding me for months.  I left her with no other option.

"All right, Makani."

She looks into my eyes.  Hers are stunning and haunting.

I smile.  "I'll finish your story."

~

I will be focusing more energy on finishing Makani's Serenity, and as such, do not plan to post regularly, though I will still be around and reading what I can.  I do hope to post on here to let you know how far I've come, both as a certain level of accountability for me and as a way to stay connected.  My other adventures have been slowing down, and I think this is a wonderful opportunity to finish my year old task.  I need to finish.  I need to finish for myself, for Makani, and for those of you who are interested in her tale.

Thank you for reading my blog thus far, and don't worry.  I will be around and I will be back.  My goal is to have this first draft done by August 14th.  Let's see if I can make it together, shall we?

~

It's A Mezcla Day

Have you heard about the flying car?  It's real.  Be sure to watch the video if you can.  It's only a few minutes long.

~~~~~

Peaches and mold should not go together.  Again, I'm not a gardener (I can't even spell it; I keep typing "gardner" apparently to match my accent).  I was going to wash and eat one of the peaches from the second (and last) harvest, but well, I found some that were bad.  I threw out seven, but fifteen still looked good.  Out of those fifteen, we only had to pitch two or three because the bugs had made homes inside.  But, considering how little I'd done since I'd brought the peaches in, I'm pretty happy.  Just squeamish as always, but I'm working on getting over it.  The peaches are now cut in halves, sugared, and waiting for breakfast.

~~~~

Which reminds me.  After Hadassah suggested that I use my experience dealing with the peach tree and the peaches in a story sometime, I realized some things about my next novel.  (Don't worry; I'll finish Makani's Serenity first.  I'm just world and character building in my head for now.)  This next story will take place in space, but my protagonist is going to be a bit of a gardner ;-) , so she needs a garden sort of haven.  Naturally, there will be a peach tree.  The idea, combined with a delicious breakfast of sugared peach halves I ate a little while back, led to a working title for my next novel.  And let me tell you, titles and names are tricky things for me to come up with.  It is a rare thing for me to have a title for a story, especially a novel, before it's written!

~~~~

I didn't know a butterfly could look happy until I saw one the other day, sitting on top of one of the many rotting peaches under my tree.  It worked its wings up and down, slowly, seeming quite relaxed, and wasn't bothered when I walked up to the tree to watch its drunken stupor.  I hope it didn't get pulled over for an FWI (flying while intoxicated).

~~~~

Here's a fun writing exercise I found from a quick Google search that led me to this page from fictionwriting.about.com.  I haven't looked at it in great detail, but I noticed you can read what others have written and share your own work.  If you decide you'd like to try the exercise, I'd like to see it if you're comfortable sharing.  Maybe it's because I'm now working on a murder mystery, but I think the lake description is particularly interesting and has a lot of potential.

~~~~

What's your mezcla today?

Makani's Stars

Though Makani's Serenity is not an outer space type of story, I've known for a long time that the stars were important to the characters.  And I've wished and looked for a theme or prominent object in the story that I could find jewelry of and wear - my own little symbol for my novel and beloved characters.  (I got this idea from Rebekah Roberts' novel Petals and her rose jewelry.)

But it wasn't until a recent outing with my good friends, Rebekah Roberts and Hadassah Fey, that I accepted that the stars, and in a way the night sky, were that object or idea that I had been wanting.  We were at our favorite dollar jewelry store (we really go all out when we hit the town), when we found a long golden chain with a circle pendant of a Man in the Moon profile with a star inside the bottom of the circle.

It was the first piece of jewelry with or about stars that I had really liked.  This one had character.  I knew within seconds that this was the pendant I had wished for.

Amusingly enough, the moon is not mentioned once in my novel, and there is only one star in the circle.  Nevertheless, this was the one for me.

And by that point I was so excited about stars that I kept looking at the golden necklaces on the wall, a small section that vanishes among thousands of colorful fashion jewelry throughout the store, and I found another pendant that I wanted greatly.  This one was smaller, on a short chain, and in some ways rather simple, but that made it all the more perfect for me.  It was a clear plastic gem that catches the light with a four point golden disc behind it, looking like a star twinkling in the darkness.  It didn't take me long to decide to buy it.

If you see me wearing either of these, I'm thinking of Makani's Serenity.