What I'm Into January 2014

Linking up with Leigh Kramer's What I'm Into series again. I love this series because it encourages me to remember the highlights of my life the past month, try new things thus making new highlights to write about, and I get to read what many others have found and done, expanding my community, even if only a little bit.

The start of the new year was a somber and contemplative one for me, and January has been a challenge. This month I've been in South Carolina for six months, but everything is still fairly new and most things are yet undiscovered. Friends and family are far away, and I didn't feel much like celebrating on New Year's Eve. New Year's Day greeted me as the something inbetween.

My parents drove into town for a pleasant visit (and we missed getting a picture? hm). It was strange how the move has changed things, and how my family is the same yet also different after so many months of life. I wonder how they thought I had changed? I also talked on the phone with my brother in Oklahoma for his birthday, the first I've been really and truly away for. I wished I could have been there to put up the birthday banner for him.

I'm still taking steps to be who I am and be seen for that. This month I got a pixie haircut and took steps to declutter and simply my closet to make that part of life less stressful. It's easier to like what I see in the mirror now. But I'm still filled with doubt about my choices in general and I struggle to trust my instincts. I want to adopt everyone else's passions as my own and enjoy the same intensity, but as that doesn't work for long (if at all) I'm still determining my passion(s) and my cause, and how I will go about pursuing them.

And that leads me to the most important book I read this month. I finished The Complete Idiot's Guide to the Power of the Enneagram, finally learning, after weeks of uncertainty and doubt, that I am a 9. It's a combination of relief and agony to have that label clear things up. When I read the chapter describing 9s, it was like the author had seen into my soul--I felt all the things described in those pages, and I would have cried if I hadn't been reading in a public place--and then dissected it. Ouch. Of course "there isn't a strong individual self in the 9, and that's the challenge--learning to develop one" - page 163. Of course that's me. (insert self-depreciating scream of rage here. oh, wait, I might have something...)

"9s struggle to have a strong and consistent sense of self." - p 159 Sigh. It's true. Yay, me.
Now that I know, I'm trying to learn, trying to grow, trying to be more assertive and be me, not someone else. But man, that is the challenge.
(...I was going to write a separate post about discovering my Enneagram type, but I think that covers it pretty well.)

Over the New Year's break I read the greatly enjoyable The Runaway King, the second book in the Ascendance Trilogy. I wrote about the first one here. Like the first one, I read the second book in just a few days. I wrote a brief review on Goodreads. The third book in the trilogy, The Shadow Throne, comes out next month! Can't wait.

I have discovered the hilarity, awkwardness, and joy that is the show FRIENDS. How did I miss this? As it's not on Netflix, I'm glad my library has it, because I'm getting in the queue. (...I've been watching a lot of British shows over the last several months. Yes, Sherlock is a big culprit. As is Doctor Who.) I think I enjoy it much more now than I would have when it was on because of how I have changed and because I'm now the same age as the characters.

Also, thanks to the library, this month I learned how to suspend my holds until certain dates, so I'm timing the movies I get so that I can actually watch them before they're due back. I should have a Bollywood romance coming available just in time for Valentime's Day! I consider this the perfect way to celebrate another year of singleness. With some tea or wine, of course.

I watched Bride and Prejudice, and it was amazing. I posted this on Facebook when it was over:

It made me wonder about the impact and reach our creativity can have, now and into the distant future. It makes me hopeful.

I tried some anime shows on Hulu, RideBack and Kino's Journey. Both interesting, for different reasons. Neither quite along the lines of what I usually watch (or read). I finished RideBack. Kino's Journey might be a bit more intense than I prefer, so I haven't watched more than a few episodes so far, but I like the concept. I also watched the first episode of Game of Thrones. Not sure what I think of it, but I was curious and wanted to see for myself what many others have been talking about.

I joined a local writing group. They meet every weekend, but I'll probably only try to join in once a month. I didn't read anything I brought, but we had a fun writing exercise where we had to include five different items in a scene and try to answer the question, Who owns these things? My heard pounded so hard when I read, I had to slow down to breathe, but when I finished, the room was silent. Then the leader said, "Wow. Welcome to the group!" I can tell you, as a self-doubting writer that was what I needed to hear.

My friend Jaimie Krycho released the first in her trilogy Bloodlines of Epheria on the Kindle, and I happily bought my copy. She originally published the story on her website, and I always looked forward to each installment. She had me loving the characters, wanting the powers, and worried about what would happen. Now I'm gonna reread Lorin's--I mean Sifani's--adventure (though I understand it is a little changed from the original?) and eagerly await the next book in the trilogy.

I had the pleasure of joining The Red Couch's book discussion on Jesus Feminist. (Mostly I read, and still am reading, the comments of others.) That book gave me much to ponder and The Red Couch and She Loves magazine inspire me to see a wider world than I can currently walk abroad.

I also signed up for the We Heart Books virtual book exchange. I've been paired up, and it's time to shop!

The other day I happened upon the song "I Lived" by OneRepublic. I love the brief interview on the song here. Adding this one to the list of inpires-me-to-move-become-and-live songs. It's pretty much been on repeat the last, what, three days.


As I was working on this post, my sister-in-law came in and asked if I wanted a chocolate cheesecake beater to lick. This month started rough, but it's ending fabulously.


So, what have you been into?

My Latest Fashion, Part Two

Home sick today, so tell my boss I'm sleeping (because I was and am about to be again), but I also wanted to share how my wardrobe is now more manageable. As I'm tired and my head is getting fuzzy again, I'll keep this brief.

So, sometime before moving last summer, I heard about the Dressing Your Truth online class. I'd long been frustrated with the full-closet-and-I have-nothing-to-wear syndrome, so I signed up. With the class I learned about movement energy, and which energy I tend to express most, and what to look for in clothes that will compliment my natural energy.

Sooo many hangers. Bye bye!

I tried to follow through, but I had timed it badly with moving, and moving had a higher priority than reworking my fashion, especially as that was a deadline that wouldn't budge. So, I tried paring down my wardrobe, keeping only the pieces that suited my type (or that I really loved anyway), and I made some notable progress, but when push came to shove, I ended up packing just about every single thing in the closet.

Fast forward several months, and I'd grown quite tired of shifting hangers around, trying to find the clothes I liked, wanted, and needed. So I'd began reading up on how to do a minimal wardrobe, or capsule wardrobe, something I'd thought would be a good idea for me for a long, long time. So when my last three day weekend came around, I decided it was time. (Right after I got my hair cut. And on that note, it's amazing how clothes can look and feel different with a new 'do. Taking care of both on the same weekend was a good choice.)

I did a fair bit of looking around online. Pinterest was actually one of my first stops in addition to a Google search. There's quite a bit out there on the topic. The blogs I found to be most helpful can be found here, here, and here. Most sites and links I found focus on a goal of 30-40 items (some had a goal of fewer, but the most important point in all of them was to work with yourself and what you want), and some mention having different capsule wardrobes for different seasons.

I looked for lists of must-haves and instructions on how to pare things down, then I just went for it. The "rules" were my guidelines but not requirements. I just started with finding what I truly loved the best, and got rid of what I knew I didn't but had until now felt obligated to keep. I divided things into type (shirt, dress, skirt, jacket, pants), and tried most everything on unless I knew I'd want to keep it. My mantra as I tried on piece after piece, determining if I liked the look and feel and if it would go with anything else, or as I pulled something I knew I didn't want off a hanger was, "I don't owe _____." I didn't owe any person who may have gifted me the garment. I didn't owe any sentimentality of what once was. And I certainly didn't owe the clothing itself (though I often felt as if I did!). What I did owe, what I did want, was my own peace and not to be owned by my closet. That kept me going.

Ta da!
...I'm getting a sense of naturally preferred color scheme/tone here.

I didn't take any before pictures, because I was focused and in the moment, and hadn't thought I'd be blogging about it and oh a comparison for effect would be good. Ah well. Just ooo and ahh and trust me when I say this is impressive.

I'm not quite done as there are some garments not pictured that I haven't decided what to do with yet, I'm pretty sure I ought to thin down how many jackets I have, and I haven't looked at most of what's in my chest of drawers, but the current count of hangers in my closet for shirts, skirts, dresses, and pants? 37. (And 5 sweaters, which I did go through, but they go in the drawers.)

The in-progress end result is several bags stuffed full of perfectly good clothes that other people can enjoy, and I can see what I own at a glance, and quickly figure out ways that most pieces will go with others, for an easier to enjoy wardrobe than I remember ever having before.

I'll keep working on it. There are still some things I think I want to pare down more or replace. But I got the bulk of it done, and getting dressed in the morning has been a whole lot easier not having to play the clothing version of Tetris every day.

Have you ever attempted a capsule wardrobe? Did you succeed?


Now I'm back to bed. The Teddy Grahams are calling and my eyelids are falling.

My Latest Fashion, Part One

The loud airy buzz of the dryer stopped. "Ready?" the salon owner asked.

"Most definitely."

She spun me around to look in the mirror. I don't know what exactly I had been expecting to see, but with the first glance at my reflection, I was glad to own being me.

~~

I love long weekends because that extra day transforms an ordinary weekend into a stage of opportunities. Things I've long wanted to do suddenly have ample time. All I have to do is step up and risk being seen. What narrative shall I live this time?

I'd been thinking about it for a while, though 1) no one but my household knew and 2) it was drastic enough that it would likely surprise just about every single person I know. (Granted that was part of the attraction. I'm turning into such a rebel.) So, on Thursday, I called and made my appointment. I was going to risk surprising people and being seen. I had chosen something I wanted, because I wanted it, and followed through without further hemming and hawing. (Growth! More on this in a later post on the Enneagram.) ((Update: I snuck a mini post on the Enneagram inside this one which is now up.))

I got my very first ever pixie haircut.

A Christmas-time Before

At the salon, I was fearless. I finally had no serious sentimental attatchement to my hair. It had always been some form of long since I was little until very recently. My last short cut was a wavy, poofy bob. And that was more than a year ago. This time, my once again longer than shoulder length hair was going away. I wasn't going to regret it, even if I didn't like the look very much. I was ready. Ready for a change, ready to surprise, ready to not have hair fall into my face and mouth, or get caught by purse straps and puullll. But I hoped and thought I could like the new look.


Perhaps my reasons are part defiance, a challenge and an acknowledgement to myself that who I was is not who I am now, another step in getting settled in my new life and my braver me. Part experiment. I wasn't sure if it would work with my face, but I wanted to find out. And part devil-may-care. After all, why not? It's just hair. It will grow. And I figured if I wanted it, I could rock it

At the heart of it, I wanted to be me and seen as me, not what anybody says or expects I need to be. Whether I'll keep it pixie short or not, I don't know. It might not even matter. What matters most is I went after something I wanted for myself. I followed through.

~~

"Do you like it?" she asked as I stared into the mirror, mouth agape.

"I like it a lot!"

I felt fabulous.

Stay tuned for My Latest Fashion, Part Two. The wardrobe.

 

And when the phone rings...

Sometimes it's easy to feel isolated out here on the East Coast. Just about everybody I know is back in Oklahoma, and while social media is helpful and good, it's no replacement for the daily interactions and weekly routines with friends.

And then there are times you get a phone call from a friend and hear a story of how someone was sent to your friend as an angel of encouragement, the prayer answered as soon as it was offered.

And in those times, it's like the distance has melted and not only are you closer to your friend but you're also closer to God, and you feel unity and wholeness in your spirit.

May everyone who feels alone have such moments.

We Heart Books, a Virtual Book Exchange!

Yay! I just submitted my form to participate in the We Heart Books, a virtual book exchange!  I found out about it thanks to the lovely Leigh Kramer, and immediately knew I wanted to participate. I just wasn't sure if I could follow through. Something about doubting senses and gravy and...nevermind. Thing is, I'm in and I'm excited! I can hardly wait to find out who I'm matched up with and get him or her a book!

If a book swap sounds like something up your alley, there's still time to join in. The basic idea is to decide if you prefer paperback or ebook, fill out the form, wait for your match, and then find a new or gently used book under $10 to swap away! (Paperbacks are an option for United States and Canada residents. International folks should check the ebook box.) The form opened up on Monday and will be available through Saturday, the 18th.

In addition to this being a crazy, cool idea that spans a huge area, my favorite part may be the welcome (without being required) open-endedness of creativity in your package if you want to ship a paperback yourself.

I'm not really looking for a must-have book, although I was thinking of that Doctor Who: 11 Doctors, 11 Stories paperback (over $10, though), but I'm excited for sure to see if I'm given a new love. And I'm tickled to be part of an exchange of this size. I love it when the world is large and the world is small and I am part of it with many others. It makes me feel alive.

See all the details and awesomeness our three hostesses, Emily, Kalyn, and Katie, put together over here at the We Heart Books site.


Are you in? What's on your wishlist?

What I'm Into - December 2013

I don't feel like I was into much last month, but there are a few highlights worth noting. Alas, this is the second time I'm writing this post, as everything was erased, so I'm not going to make it in time for the linkup, but you can check out Leigh Kramer's December post and see the other awesome bloggers who've joined here. It's a good series, cool people, and worth some time.


I like the chance to think over what's been happening over the last month. It reminds me of what my life is, how much has actually happened, and how meaningful what I choose is. It's an opportunity to see where I've been, who I've become, and maybe where I'll be going next.

Last month, it didn't feel like I did much more than work, Christmas shopping and wrapping and shipping, and rest. Once I got past the stresses of being away from home at Christmas for the first time, I quite enjoyed it.

I attended an Episcopal church for Advent and found that I was getting used to the services, and glad for the liturgy. I'm still learning and deciding what to do for church attendance, but there are many things that I find I quite like about the Episcopal church.

So there was Christmas, and there was more, and remembering makes me grateful.

Reading: 

I read five books in December, one of which was the final book in one of my favorite series, The Ranger's Apprentice. Long anticipated, it didn't disappoint. I loved spending time with my favorite characters, meeting a new one, and seeing how time has changed them. Flanagan managed to break my heart and put it back together with laughter and perseverance. The story has a few, deliberate parallels with the first few books, which adds to the nostalgia, yet it is uniquely its own tale. I love these books and the final one was sad but beautiful. (Though I still want to ask "but whhyyyy?")

For Christmas, my sister-in-law and brother gave me the book format of Neil Gaiman's "Make Good Art" graduation speech. The words are inspiring, challenging, and encouraging, and the book is visually creative and fabulous. Neil Gaiman and Chip Kidd certainly made their own rules, and the whole piece is better for it. As soon as I had a solid chunk of time, I read it in one sitting, and promptly pulled up my current novel and risked some wonderful mistakes.

For 2013 I had challenged myself to read 25 books before the year ended. I knew I could read more than I had been, and I wanted to see it happen. I've been enjoying keeping track of my reading progress with Goodreads, and you can find what I'm reading there. At the end of the year, I'd recorded 35 books (five of which were by Neil Gaiman...I feel like a stalker). Nearly all of the children's picture books I peruse on any given day didn't get recorded. I'm not sure why. Some of them are quite fabulous, and should be noted. This year, I think I'll change that.

Listening:

After seeing Frozen early in the month, I just could not get enough of the song "Let It Go" and I'm not sure I would want to. (I actually went to see the movie twice, not something I do often, but Frozen was worth every penny.) Among many and many other reasons, I geek out that the song includes the word "fractals". I mean how cool is that? I love how fiction and song reflect, inform, and inspire real life. There were other factors involved, but it isn't a coincidence that I shared that I am an empath on the same day that I saw Frozen (the first time).

And when my sister-in-law found the Frozen soundtrack at Target, she bought it for me. So the last few days of December to now, I've had the songs dancing in my head quite a bit. So good. There's nothing quite like driving to "Vuelie" surrounding me with the fresh daylight or stunning sunset over the river.

Out and About:

I learned first hand that 3:30am has beautiful traffic, no joke, when I took my friend to the airport so she could go home for Christmas.

Went with my sister-in-law and niece to a local ice skating show. It was like a dance recital but with blades, coldness all around, and, you know, ice. Very neat and I had a great time. Hoping to see Tim Dolensky on the TV for the competition on Sunday. He clearly loves skating and is good at it. I love his choreography and freshness he takes to the ice.

Aubrey and I took an evening and headed out to the Festival of Lights. We saw everything from aliens and the solar system, to the Ravenel Bridge, to an owl peering down at us and a patriotic eagle. We listened to Josh Groban wish us a merry Christmas and chatted as we drove through the display.

Odds and Ends:

I got woefully behind in writing to friends, practiced a bit of honest expression with people I don't know very well when they came to visit, grabbed more books and movies from the library than I can possibly carry at one time, shared my one word for 2013 and chose a new one for 2014. I like my new word for 2014, but it's awfully big.

At New Year's Eve, I had no plans and no party to go to, but that was okay. I didn't much feel like celebrating. 2013 had been good, and in some ways, I was sorry to see it go. In other ways, the new year would just be a continuation of the present. And that brings us to now, to January, to 2014. If I knew a little better where I was going from here, I think the new year would excite me more. For now, I'm content to take it one day at a time.



Have you been into anything this last month that you want to share? Pull up a chair; I've got some tea...